Patterns

Last week, child number three and I spent time watching Vi Hart videos on the Khan Academy website. The films lure you in with the hypnotic into “so you’re math class and your teacher is droning on about –insert math principle- and you’re bored so you start doodling”. She then fills her notepad with doodles that cunningly illustrate the math principle that the fictitious teacher was unable to engage you in. As a consequence we have been trying to make hexaflexagons, drawing snakes that slither under and over their own bodies and replicating Sierpinski’s Triangles. The fast pace of Vi’s speech, the many coloured sharpies and the casual reference to mathematicians as though they are friends has a hypnotic effect, Vi is an effectively eccentric tutor. Number three isbusily filling her notebook with colours and shapes which are the basic tenets of patterns.

I find that drawing patterns has a meditative effect. I start with a blank piece of paper, then I invent a rules about colour, line or shape and proceed to fill the page using the rule. I then assess the result and puzzle over the next idea. I realise that I use a pattern to make a pattern.

This making of patterns often leads me in to a state of flow, which Csíkszentmihályi describes as “an intrinsically rewarding or optimal state that results from intense engagement with daily activities". Conversely, I often start to make patterns to disengage from the intense engagement of the demands of my progeny. I also find that getting into the flow can solve problems seemingly unrelated to the task at hand. Nice huh?!

The Sierpinski Triangle is a fractal construction: the image is self-similar and therefore similar at any point, by magnification or reduction, regardless of scale.

littoral

Sharon invited me over to her island on Thursday. Instead of making our usual Lines in the Sand on Minjerribah (North Stradbroke Island), she encouraged us to explore Mudlines in the Mangroves of Russell Island. Also known by the Aboriginal name of Canaipa (rhymes with sniper, which is apt as it means land of the pointed spear), it is a fifteen minute sojourn on a cat from the mainland. Six of us have shirked our usual routine to find artful meaning in the littoral.

When we get to the site and wander down to the shoreline I can see across the Canaipa Passage to the western shore of Minjerribah. I have never seen this side of the island, a line of trees descends into small sandstone cliffs that descend into the sea. The mangroves are alive with bird-call - small honey eaters dart through the branches while ibises honk in the sky. We wander round stumbling as we get used to the suck of the mud as we walk. Abandoned boats are being reclaimed by nature, exposing old copper nails greened by the elements.

I settle away from the group under the spreading boughs of a mangrove, it's soothing looking up into the branches. I settle to sketch the scene, tucked into the curving trunk. When returning to base-camp I find Sharon experimenting with the idea of scale. Using the grassy marshland as a canvas, she is arranging fallen branches which to my eye looks to be a dragon rising from the ground.

Island time ends I'm dropped back to the jetty to catch my boat back to my usual regime. This seven hour adventure has given me the fabulous illusion of a much longer break. The winter sunshine, the listening to juicy art-talk, the travelling across the bay and the sanctuary of the natural environment have nourished my being. Days later, idly scratching at my midge bites I'm remind that I'm itching to get back out into nature - littoral or literal.

littoral |ˈlɪt(ə)r(ə)l|
adjective
relating to or situated on the shore of the sea or a lake: the littoral states of the Indian Ocean.
• Ecology relating to or denoting the zone of the seashore between high- and low-water marks, or the zone near a lake shore with rooted vegetation: limpets and other littoral molluscs.
noun
a region lying along a shore: irrigated regions of the Mediterranean littoral.
• Ecology the littoral zone.

Motile

Professor Alan Mackay-Sim looks the business - fitted chinos, boots, untucked shirt with sleeves rolled-up, natty moustache and intelligent, lively eyes. In the Queensland Brain Institute's (QBI) auditorium, Professor Bartlett tells us during the intro that Mackay-Sim used to be a hang-gliding hell man. Risk in leisure has translated to courage in the lab with the discovery that olfactory neurons continuously regenerate. This led to enquiry into why this is so and could this habit of regeneration be mimicked then applied to non-regenerating neurons.

In yesterday's seminar about the cell biology of schizophrenia, Mackay-Sim outlined the research methodology and results from the labs involved thus far. Schizophrenia is complex because the risk genes are polygenic in nature and vary from one patient to the next. Mackay-Sim's slides were fascinating to a non-scientist like me and a challenge to completely understand. The benefits of using olfactory neurons are that they are easier to harvest and grow, by testing olfactory neurons from patients with schizophrenia (Sz) and a control group they have found:

• 1700 mRNAs altered between the control group and patients
• cell cycles are reduced (Sz)
• cells are cycling faster and moving further faster (Sz)
• cyclin protein is higher, particularly D1 (Sz)
• focal adhesion kinase are fewer and smaller (Sz)
• less Reelin (which is the stop signal for cell migration in the cortex) (Sz)
• less ribosomal proteins (Sz)
• EIF2 (responsible for deciding if cells grow) also down (Sz)

There were also a few references to assays, which I think in this case is a procedure for measuring the biochemical or immunological activity of a sample - not sure if this is the same as an experiment. Word of the day MOTILITY - the ability of organisms and fluid to move without help. In my non-science world most likely to be associated with sperm - which the slides looked like, though they were not, or maybe they were - I'm NOT an expert and professors are not above pranking.

2003's Queenslander of the Year rounded out the seminar by sharing that a different lab had got almost exactly the opposite results to those mentioned above. This leaves them with a conundrum to puzzle over and solve. So my first foray into the real world of neuroscience was filled with learning.

POST SCRIPT: As my 10 year old watched me drawing MOTILITY she asked "Is that sperm?", when I answered no her next sentence was "I'm going to read WHERE DID I COME FROM now."

It's not about the money

I was talking to a few art mates this morning about a residency I am considering. After describing the project and how it links with Mindsettle, Trevor asked will you be paid? Excellent question, in the initial discussion there was no mention of funding for materials or art making. This doesn't mean there won't be no money, but it's a discussion that needs to happen.  Though they are screeds of writing about the value of art to our culture there is often a reluctance to pay. Trevor says 30 years ago no-one would have thought of asking an artist to do work for free, though pay rates were low, these days it's almost a given that an artist can just whip something up for nothing.

How do we measure our worth? I like challenges but there's a part of me that is tired of the expectation of doing something for nothing. I need to carefully weigh all the benefits before committing to more 'volunteer' work.   W. Somerset Maugham summarises my sentiments perfectly in 'Of Human Bondage':

"It is not wealth one asks for, but just enough to preserve one's dignity, to work unhampered, to be generous, frank and independent."

Cynicism

I was fortunate to have a mother who loved to read and lucky that she gave me the freedom to read, both in time and scope. No volume was out of bounds, no censorship. This gave me enormous joy and learning. I was allowed to kick back on my bed and read for hours. Dad used to call me mattress-back (no tittering in the back stalls). I think this idea of reading being sacred was formed in my mother’s childhood when to spend time with a book was seen as a dereliction of your household duties. To read Mum had to hide under a bed, but even there my Nana would shoo her out with a broom to chase Mum back to the housework.

Sometimes I was the right age to process the information correctly, but even when I wasn’t the words just added to my growing consciousness. It is the most brilliant way to expand your horizons. You don’t even have to leave your bed. You can travel around the world, making discoveries. Find other people who feel exactly the way you do and those who are absolutely opposite to you. Reading will open your thinking, help you to consider myriad points of view and improve your emotional intelligence. You can explore sexual fantasies and spiritual mysteries. I still get surprised at how emotional I can become when reading.

Recently, I read Caitlin Moran's book HOW TO BUILD A GIRL. I love her straight up style, that her female character loves sex, that it explores how we can change our lives to be truer to ourselves rather than fitting in to get along with others. There is a terrific treatise within the novel about cynicism, even though it's lengthy it bears quoting, because I find it heart-breakingly true of our society.

"For when cynicism becomes the default language, playfulness and invention become impossible. Cynicism scours through a culture like a bleach, wiping out millions of small, seedling ideas. Cynicism means your automatic answer becomes 'No'. Cynicism means you presume everything will end in disappointment. And this is, ultimately why anyone becomes cynical. Because they are scared someone will take advantage of them. Because they are fearful their innocence will be used against them - that when they run around gleefully trying to cram the whole world in their mouth, someone will poison them.

Cynicism is, ultimately fear. Cynicism makes contact with your skin, and a thick black carapace begins to grow - like insect armour. This armour leaves you almost unable to walk. You cannot dance, in this armour. Cynicism keeps you pinned to the spot, in the same posture forever."

We really need to think about any decision that leads us to curb our enthusiasm. Think about how joyful it is to be in the company of people who are thrilled by their life, whether they're living it large or small. Do you default to cynicism?

Purple

"You and I know we're gonna die some day." And so it came to pass that at the age of 57, Prince is dead. "Ain't gonna let the elevator break me down" and yet that's where he was found struggling for breath at the end of his life. Listening to his music is to be privy to some fantastic erotic literature set to sizzling guitar or soft silky romantic commitments to love. I became intoxicated by this smouldering-eyed dandy when at high school. I loved those early film clips featuring Wendy and Lisa with everyone in the band dancing in high heels (no wonder his hips needed replacing). They all looked fabulous, the sound was thrilling to dance to, the lyrics often outrageous and he clearly encouraged talent regardless of gender.

Prince was dedicated to living his life as an artist on his own terms. INSPIRATIONAL! So, no I'm not mourning his death - but I am more determined to appreciate life while I still have it live.

"Before this night is through you will see my point of view - Baby I'm a star!"

Possibilities

Jennifer Corriero started TakingItGlobal when she was 19 years old - its genesis was in answer to the question "What would I do if anything were possible?" Long pause - because depending on your stage of life and the responsibilities that you have attached to you, what's more likely to come to mind is the probability of getting something off the ground or the practicality of needing money to survive or having enough time to commit. So it is really interesting to hear her talk about cultivating a possibility mindset, then directing this mindset at challenges that come up.

How can I bring what I care deeply about to what I do? How do I insulate myself from the societal pressure to prove a concept is valuable, only if it is profitable? My belief is that there is a definite push against the profit at all costs mentality and more appetite for agendas with a social purpose. Strange to find myself emerging as an idealist in my late forties, it's usually the domain of youth. Maybe that's the impetus - the youth from my womb - who are negotiating this world of fear, doom and gloom. I crave leaders who inspire them (and me) with messages of hope and plans for the common good. These musings and my life experience lead me to Kurt Vonnegut's wisdom about the arts - which naturally appeals as I attempt to make my way artfully through life.

Long Haul

Sometimes it takes a long time to complete something. This piece - Gentle Soul - that I finished in February I started making 2 years ago. I was experimenting with ink on paper and really loved the vibrancy of the ink colours. The paper, that I picked up from a washi shop in Kyoto, is like corduroy and quite soft. Because of this almost fabric quality I though it might be interesting to use thread and somehow stitch it together. If you look closely you may be able to see the black stitches. So I've ended up with a patchwork, collage thing that works well against the shiny black board donated by my art mentor.

Heard this morning that Gentle Soul has been shortlisted for the Milburn Prize. The prize winner will be announced on Friday 29 April. Come and have a drink!

The War of Art

Since Christmas I've being reading my way through the mega-bundle I bought from Black Irish Books. In the War of Art, Steven Pressfield talks about the challenges of being an artist, of sitting down to do the work. "Resistance feeds on fear. We experience Resistance as fear. But fear of what? FEAR THAT WE WILL SUCCEED. That we become the person we sense in our hearts we truly are." Knowing that this is the lived experience of an author, who has successfully published many books, is heartening. To know that even when we taste success it still feels risky to pursue a creative life. I feel this resistance rising up inside me constantly, my best defence is my routine. By having a strict regimen (and letting housework slide), I can apply myself to doing the work. Each week begins with targets for each project I am working on and I get a little tingle each time one of the listed items is accomplished.

It can be difficult being your own motivator, beavering away on your own, but it's encouraging to remember Pressfield's advice "Our job in this lifetime is not to shape ourselves into some ideal we imagine we ought to be, but to find out who we already are and become it".

Intentions

I know it's February already, but for me that's when I can properly focus on my own intentions after the long summer school holiday break. The kids are back at school, daily routines are re-established and my time becomes my own again.

So in 2016, I'd like to continue to make art, exhibit and explore fabric printing. The art I have been making lately tend to be a combination of ink, pen and watercolour on paper. Patterns continue to emerge, like the image on the left, which is a simplified version of lily pads on the Enoggera reservoir.

I am also devoting time to two other art related projects, Lines in the Sand on Minjerribah (North Stradbroke Island) and Mindsettle.